Friday, March 25, 2005
;
1:36 AM
I think staying at home too much ain't that cool an idea.. at least not for now..
Too much to think of.. thoughts strays & mental anxiety builds.
It's day 6 since I went on leave, restlessness is creeping in for sure..
I think I suffer from some serious job syndromes.. 2 jobs in a row I can never cross the 2 yrs 9 mths hurdle.. I leave them by that duration...
I still love my job as a Nutrition Sales person in my previous company.. every bit of it I swear & it took me alot to ditch the job. I'm off it now. With some regrets, not being able to persue my passion no more & also the fear for not being able to get into another job ideally.
It's another milestone I am trying to record in my life chapters now & I do hope thing roll in smoothly as planned. Next chapter in life: NIE here i come.....
Down sides: Health has not been as pinkish as I would love it to be.. Glaucoma has "tortured" me for 5 yrs already & it's taking bits off me as days passes.. My right eye has undergone the knife to keep the disease at bay but he did not stop invasion.. My left eye undergoes eye drops daily to make sure the damages are kept minimal. But I think somehow God had not looked over me enuff.. Or maybe I had not looked over myself enuff.. I feel the damages on my left eye increasing by day. I fear I loss my sight to the unfriendly disease & I fear more for not being able to see anymore. I do have many many more beautiful yrs to go. I want to see more beautiful scenes, people & sights. I wanna see how beautiful my future home, husband & children would be.. I wanna see more beautiful places. I fear I do not have the chance given. I may not be a 24/7 devoted Christian but Lord ain't I still 1 of your child? Lay ur mighty healing hands on me Lord, I pray. That this disease shall not drain me off anymore.
- bedtime -
